Gaining Back Control Over Me

By March 23rd, 20212 Comments


My October plan to right this sinking ship!

The harsh realization set in quickly… even before my nimble hands could work their way around the button. (Which involved more work than my hands could handle — my hips, belly, diaphragm, and chest all got in on the sucking and maneuvering necessary to hook button into hole. Only then was the zipper apt to do its part and fingers able to complete the task.)

But let’s commend the butt and thighs on a job well done too, shimming their way into last year’s jeans. Bravo. I didn’t’ think we could make it happen. 

Going through that little ordeal, however, did nothing to numb the bitchslap awaiting me once I looked up and into the mirror before me. I should have seen it coming, but sometimes knowing it’s coming doesn’t matter, it’s like trying to prepare yourself for something you can never really be prepared for… like parenthood. 

My Go-To Excuses

So let me think here… what excuses did I use the most over the last six months that got me here? (Because these are pandemic pounds, six months ago I didn’t look like this!) 

  • I have no time. Always a solid, very malleable, and handy excuse even though I’ve been home more than ever and I haven’t been chauffeuring my kids around very much.

  • My kids. An extremely common excuse because being around them makes it difficult to concentrate for more than two minutes on anything. They’re a needy bunch, always asking for things they can get themselves but for some reason find joy in asking me countless times to do it for them instead. And the bickering they can get into with each other is mind-numbing and makes me want to dive head-first into a barrel of wine.

  • I’m depressed and scared about the future — super valid! But the response to that was potato chips every night after dinner, dark chocolate caramels (with the slightest touch of sea salt — you’re feeling me!) and wine pretty much every night. (To ease the depression of course.)

  • My job. As an mom-preneur, business is unpredictable in this new world— switching gears, being creative, and generating income in a new way is daunting. I need all the time I can find to focus on work — which comes at a high price — mental health. When you’re mentally strained, bad food choices are a no-brainer. 

My Plan Going Forward

Assess my time, so I can find the time. 

This requires time. This is an investment in my future so finding 10 to 20 minutes to see where I am, figuring out where I want to be, and taking an honest look at how I spend my time will only work to boost my potential. Typically I’m not into writing things down, analyzing, and plotting out the future—I tend to make decisions based on nothing more than feelings (i.e. I’m tired today, I don’t feel like working out). 

But we’re not here to listen to excuses anymore, that’s how we got into this mess. So, all I need to do is to find the time gaps and string together a cluster of minutes that can be used towards exercise—the good sweaty, heart-pumping kind that will make a difference in my physic. In addition to the 10-minute workouts I put together for my monthly challenges (shameless plug), I’ll also add in another 20 minutes of cardio. 

Being honest with myself about time gaps and being intentional about how I spend that time is new for me… typically I let myself off the hook without a fight. This first step should take the knee-jerk reactions out of the picture.

Next, I’m going to Stop eating like an a**hole.

A friend of mine lost about 35 pounds over the last 6 months… yes, that little B, she went in the opposite direction of many. As she bluntly stated when I asked how she lost the weight, “Basically, I stopped eating like an a**hole!” 

I loved that!

She went on to explain that she no longer picked at her kid’s leftovers, stopped finishing the tail end of the ice cream pint just to make room in the fridge, stopped the fried foods, and began paying attention to everything she ate… she did the basic things that we think don’t make a difference and lost over 30 pounds doing them.  

So step number two is to stop eating like an a**hole and to take it one step farther, I’m going to experiment with intermittent fasting. I have never done it before, but placing time constraints could be an interesting test. I don’t do well with restrictions — the kinds required by elimination diets, or deprivation — I just become evil and hate everyone around me when I try those types. But a timed one may be the thing to begin reining in my bad habits (like eating after dinner!)

I plan to eat from 11:30 am–7:30 pm. After 7:30 the kitchen is closed. In the mornings I will allow for anything I can drink, which includes coffee, and a vegetable smoothie of my own making. Basically, if it’s liquid, it’s ok.

This is going to help tremendously with the after-dinner snacking that runs rampant around here!

Lastly, I’m going to keep track.

I’ll do this by keeping measurements (Because I don’t have a scale), taking pics, and monitoring how many days for the next two weeks I did as intended. How? I’m going old-school and plan on keeping a calendar and each day I am successful, I get a pretty star!

Ok, here we go — time to pony up.

The dreaded ‘before” pic… one of the many pics that started it all.

The “Before” 10/7/20

The “Before” 10/7/20

The horror! Like ripping off a band-aid…

But I gotta tell ya though, by showing you, it makes me ready to commit because now there is no way the next pic I show is of the same body! This is the real McCoy in motivation.

So there you have it, Step 1 of Week 1. This is not an aggressive plan, but one that makes sense and is highly doable. Typically many of us start these journeys by biting off too much which is never a good idea. Beginning small, and experimenting is key.

Slow and steady can right this sinking ship! You in?


  • Debbie Roache says:

    When will you exercise? Before or after you eat? Are you still cutting out sugar?

    • Anne Marie Costanzo says:

      Hey Debbie!
      So I exercise typically after I eat breakfast – which is after 11:30 so I have a little fuel. Occasionally I’ll workout earlier on an empty stomach and so far that’s been ok too – I haven’t noticed much of a difference.
      And my sugar intake has gone down – although I still do add about 1/2 teaspoon into my coffee… I can’t get past the bitterness! Soon I’ll nix the coffee, baby steps!

Leave a Reply